How I am coping?

How am I coping?  Overall, I think pretty well.  I have spent quite a bit of mental and emotional energy on worrying, thinking, planning, feeling mad, feeling resentful, feeling powerless, feeling sad, wondering why we were brought to this point, only to have an abrupt halt.  I think about this ALL the time.  Now that I have pictures of a precious little girl, I cannot get them out of mind. 

Last week, I asked our church to pray for us and little girl.  I had not, up to this point ,even told anyone at church about our adoption plans.  Really, I had only talked about it with family and close friends.  All along, I was worried something would go wrong.  It took so long for Nepal to get moving on the matching that I wondered if they intended on doing so.  I kind of looked at this as a very long, high risk pregnancy.  But, when we got our referral, I let my guard down.  It seemed real then.  It seemed like it was really going to happen.  OK, now back to church.  It was so strange having the church pray for us.  I know that is not the word I should use to describe my feeling, but it was strange.  I did feel a bit of peace.  Then, this week, they prayed again for us and little girl.  I didn't even have to ask, they just remembered.  Again, strange and peaceful.  I am feeling this is about more than just us and this little girl.  It is so touching to me that others are hoping we can bring her home. 

Tomorrow starts school.  Being a teacher, I will be consumed with all I have to do with my class and my two sons.  In a way this is a relief.  I do have some power over these things.  God has put these children (my class and my own kids) here in front of me now.  I will be available and present for them 100%.  I will not stop doing what I think I need to do to advocate for the adoption situation, but I know I will not be thinking about it all day.  I am doing what is put in front of me each day and I will trust that the adoption will work out.  (OK, I will struggle to trust that the adoption will work out-but I'll work on this too).  

AND, I will be praying for all of the prospective adoptive parents and their prospective children.  I hope they will feel some peace.
Carrie